Tuesday, January 15, 2008

Change the Menu

All is not lost for this year's session of Congress. Yes, I know the only legislation put thru that can be touted by the Dems is the minimum wage increase, which affects a whopping 2% of the general population. Grandma Mimi still dreaming of a total nanny state, it's for the children you know, has revamped the menu in the delis, grills and salad bars of the U.S. House of Representatives, according to The Politico.

Grandma Mimi thinks she can save the universe, her goal of goals, by upgrading the menu selections and installing 'ecotainers' to replace coffee cups. Napkins are dispensed one at a time and biodegradable is the word of the day.

The more upscale selections of food are more pricey to the staffers and other workers, but hey, stop complaining. You're saving the planet. Funny how higher prices always follow these choices. Note to self: check into pricing stock on these suppliers. Why should Al Gore and RFK,Jr get rich alone? Pears with Stilton cheese and watercress. Cumin-scented leg of lamb with almond couscous. Yellow tomatoes, purple Peruvian potatoes, free-range chicken, cage-free shell eggs, and on and on.

Vending machines sell Wolfgang Puck coffee in choices of Vive la Creme Caramel and Tropic of Chocolate.

Recycling stations are different shapes and sort garbage between compostable and landfill waste.

When questioned about the new vendor of yogurt, Stonyfield Farm, the Republicans were immediately pooh poohed. Stonyfield Farm CEO, Gary Hirshberg is a big time Democrat party player. Probably just a coincidence. Note to self: check stock prices on Stonyfield Farm.

And to fill you with the we-are-the-world spirit, names in foreign languages have been added to the ambiance. "The taco bar is the "Taqueria." The grill is "A la Pancha." The salad bar has expanded to "Salad/Antipasti." How sophisticated.

The Politico reporter tested the new compostable straw in the hot coffee. The straw became pliable and drooped but it didn't entirely disintegrate. The house official overseeing the cafeteria said he tells people "Sip your coffee like a normal human being. "We're trying to save the planet here."

So, instead of important legislation, your nation's leadership is focusing on the really important stuff. Thanks, Speaker Pelosi. Another proud moment for womanhood. Never mind supporting the troops or continuing tax breaks for ordinary families.

Let's eat.


Anonymous said...

You would *love* my office breakroom. We are the most environmentally correct construction company on the planet, and I mean that in every literal sense of every word of that sentence.

Our utensils are either washable or made from potato starch. Leaves a greasy residue in your hot food, like soup for example, but hey. No styrofoam allowed in the front door; all of our catering vendors must comply to our strict wishes or lose our business.

And we compost.


A BIG bin, right beside the coffee machine. It's lovely.

Anonymous said...

Of course we can't be worried about real people and real issues! Being green looks so much better on paper. Recyclable, of course.

Conservative Belle said...

Your story had me laughing and then rolling my eyes at Grandma MiMi. Good post.